There are 5 simple changes that could enhance your relationships around the holidays.
I didn’t say the changes would be easy!
- Stop Trying To Prove That You’re Right
How much energy have you wasted over the years insisting on proving to someone that you are right. Is it really that important to be right? And more to the point, isn’t “being right” just your interpretation? Challenge yourself to keep quiet – zip it up and breathe – when you’re tempted to go on a rampage of proving you’re right. Your restraint will create real peace in the situation, as well as gain you respect from the person that’s expecting you to argue with them.
- Don’t Criticize
Realize it is very important to validate what others think and do. There’s more than one way to do everything, and just because it’s not your way or is not the way that it’s “always been done”, it does not mean that it has to continue to be done that way. Allow for flexibility. Give yourself the opportunity to experience things differently — leave the criticism at home this year.
- No Blame Game
If you’re late, whose fault is it? Your partner was slow getting ready or the kids wouldn’t get off the computer? Do not blame. “It is what it is”. Blaming accomplishes nothing. Look within to see what could have happened differently. You don’t need to discuss it further or complain, which sets a negative tone for the gathering. Again RESTRAINT is the skill to be called on.
- Don’t Take What Others Say Personally
We all have our ‘triggers.’ Is there a once-a-year comment that always comes out of someone’s mouth and just sets you off? I have something for you to think about: when someone says something that triggers you, stop and think “I wonder what they’re feeling that prompts them to say that?” It’s always about the other person, not you.
- Be Grateful
Turn your thoughts to the things that are good and right in your life and focus on gratitude – not what may be less than perfect.