Author Archives: Angela Winslow

Affair Counseling

When a couple comes in for help after discovering an affair I try to be reassuring and calmly lay out the structure of what needs to happen to ‘get over’ this crisis. Couples need a path to visualize the end … Continue reading

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Attitudes on infidelity

It seems that our attitudes toward premarital sex and extramarital sex have an inverse relationship. The more we tolerate sexual activity before marriage, and people “getting it out of their system,” perhaps the less tolerant we become once one makes … Continue reading

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Three Outcomes after Infidelity

In my experience there are three basic patterns in the way couples reorganize themselves after an infidelity– 1. they never really get past the affair, 2. they pull themselves up by the bootstraps and let it go, or 3. they … Continue reading

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A weekly sex prescription?

http://www.cnn.com/2016/04/11/health/sex-frequency-happiness-research/index.html Stories about sex and couples in relationship always capture my attention and this is a good one. One caveat is that there is no ‘normal’ in terms of how much sex a couple ‘should’ be having… however, since sex … Continue reading

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More about Boundaries 

All couples deal with boundaries: what is ok and what is not, what is individual, what is ours, and what is public. A relationship consists of roles and rules that we begin to enact at first meeting, so a couple … Continue reading

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Divorce from a child’s perspective

This is so poignant. A child asking her parents to be friends. She talks about wanting everyone to be steady, low, where her heart is. Such wisdom.

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Take personal responsibility for your relationship

Falling in love is a bit like losing yourself to somebody else. There is chemistry behind falling in love and it is shown that dopamine has a powerful impact on our brain and makes us feel like we are high … Continue reading

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What happens after being ‘in love’.

People usually nod their heads when considering the notion that the first and ‘in love’ stage of a relationship transitions to something else. Terry Real has said that this first stage is Love without Knowledge. Yikes ! How do you … Continue reading

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When baby makes 3

A new baby often results in a sexual dry spell for the parents that extends beyond the months it takes to recover from birth – in some cases, it can go years. But do children extinguish the flame of desire, or … Continue reading

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Using the CNI (Core Negative Image)

How to Break through your CNI We talked about an intimacy exercise where each partner writes down the core negative image of the other. Then he/she writes down what their core negative image is of themselves. Compare the two and … Continue reading

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