Category Archives: CouplesCare.net

Nurturing squashes desire

What is the difference between love and desire? Love and desire relate and conflict. Love is: When you care, worry, feel responsible for someone. You want to minimize threats, reduce the distance, and nurture them. Desire is: an expression of … Continue reading

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Is Porn an Addiction for You?

The Porn Addiction Quiz I ran across this article and quiz in the online Men’s Health magazine. http://www.mensfitness.com/women/sex-tips/quiz-are-you-addicted-to-porn To avoid the ads associated with this link I copied and pasted the quiz and scoring. I found the comments in the … Continue reading

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Sexual Desire And Lack Thereof.

Stuck in a no sex relationship? Lack of sexual desire

A common complaint of couples in long term relationships is a decline in sexual desire. Many may think that men do most of the complaining, however research suggests that the stress of a long-term relationship can have a dampening effect … Continue reading

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The choice to self-soothe

How To Self-Soothe When You Are Under Stress

A young child learns fairly early how to calm down when he is upset. Hopefully parents and caregivers are available in the early years to soothe with touch and holding but gradually the child will learn ways to self soothe … Continue reading

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Wordless Connecting

how couples can recconnect without using words exercise

Many young couples especially those with small children struggle to maintain closeness- and no wonder! The priority is taking care of the kids as it should be. Often whoever comes home last for work is faced with a tussle of … Continue reading

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What makes couples therapy successful?

marriage and couples counseling services in sand diego ca

Sometimes people ask me what my success rate is when working with couples on their marriage. Even if it were possible to answer that question, the results would reveal very little about my — or any therapist’s — skill. Whether … Continue reading

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Two Steps In The Affair Recovery Dance

help after discovering an affair

Even though I’ve worked with many couples to help them find a healing pathway after an affair, I recognize there is no foolproof measure for determining whether or not a marriage is going to “make it” in the end. There … Continue reading

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How Love Can Kill Desire

What is the difference between love and desire?

What is the difference between love and desire? So many couples come in with stale sex and relationship boredom – they feel ample love but desire has suffered. The reason for this is that love and desire conflict. “Love is … Continue reading

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How does co-dependence show up in relationships

11 Signs That You Are  In A Codependence Relationship The word co-dependence was first used in the 70s to describe the pattern of coping behavior in the partner or family member of an alcoholic. I like Melodie Beattie’s simple definition: … Continue reading

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Are You Getting Married But Worrying How To Avoid Divorce

Planning a Wedding Can Be a Lonely Time The summer is wedding season. If you’re not attending one over the next few weekends, you’re probably planning one of your own. With so much ceremony and meaning packed into those 24 … Continue reading

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